Fan Fiction


By Kavi_Darkwolf
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Chapter 1: Aryll

"OUCH!" the girl fell on her back with a large bruise already growing on her left side.
The blonde, middle aged woman holding the staff stared down at her with a slight smile playing on her lips.
"You forgot to block," she said calmly.

The girls green eyes flashed, but she suppressed the strange anger she felt welling in her. She hooded her eyes to make herself look calm, but Aryll heard the tightness in her voice as she said, "How could I have blocked in two places at once?"
"That's why you use both ends of the staff," said Aryll, "up on your feet, Kavi."

Kavi jumped up and ran for her staff that had fallen at the other end of the stone cave. Suddenly, she was tripped from behind and fell face first near her staff.
"You never turn your back on your opponent," came the annoying voice behind her.

This time Kavi couldn't keep the anger from her voice,"YOU DIDN'T

"This way you won't forget what it feels like," answered Aryll. She looked at Kavi's green eyes and decided lessons were over for the day, "Take your staff and go."
Kavi got up, grabbed her staff, and stormed out of the cave.

Aryll walked into a side cave and laid her staff on two nails above
the fire place and sighed. She sat on her bed and stared into the fire she had lit before Kavi came over.

She sat that way for a long while as the fire guttered low, thinking about the thirteen-year-old girl with black hair, green eyes, and strange green lips. Kavi had the makings of a great swordsman, but Aryll hadn't learned the ways of the sword, as her brother had, sufficently enough to teach Kavi.

After returning from the Forsaken fortress with the pirates, Aryll had asked Orca to teach her the ways of the staff. She had learned very well, and had taken over his position when he had passed away.

Kavi could become a great fighter, but she was impatient to learn. She had fire running through her and couldn't keep from getting angry. But she retained her lessons well.

Aryll had also noticed that Kavi was restless as the sea that had slowly been shrinking, so that islands looked more like mountains rising from a low sea. The Great Sea was becoming no longer great.

Aryll sighed as so much worry about Kavi, the sea that was ebbing away, and the people of Outset Island who had come to live there after the rest had moved to escape the monsters, wieghed on her.

These people certainly didn't like her or Kavi.

Aryll sighed again and lay back on her bed to sleep for a while.

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Comments on this chapter

Koroks Rock says:

Good. You'll want to edit the spacing errors in the center, but you're definately on the right track. Onwards!

Kavi_Darkwolf says:

Thanks for putting my storie up here! smile.gif

achitka says:

Yay! Good stuff, I'll be looking forward to another chapter and I hope you post it sooner and not later - see ya Achitka tongue.gif

Kavi_Darkwolf says:

I've written it, but it hasn't posted yet...

FeldonLuminex says:

Niceness. Good thing you made sure Aryll stopped being STUPID by looking through that stupid spyglass you only use once anyway. Awesome start, hey KR please hurry up with checking the next chapter, I wanna read it! lol

Anime James says:

Above-average fanfic that I'll follow with great interest; It'd be nice if Aryll retained some of her former self, though.

Anyways, Kavi's a believable character, and the problem you've set up is one of the most interesting I've found yet in a fanfic - except for in 'A Goron Stole My Gumball', of course. wink.gif But maybe I'm just biased.

jesustrevinio says:

wow,It feels like this is like 10 years after WW with the Great Sea shrinking and all,You should be in the Story boad team for any future Zelda titles!Keep up the good work,Im gonna write something!

Kavi_Darkwolf says:

Thanx! wink.gif


You've inspired me!



Kavi_Darkwolf says:

My bad. That second one was me.

Koroks Rock says:

hmm. I didn't realize this at first, but you seem to have misinterpreted me- don't make each new sentence it's own paragraph. Make each complete thought or action it's own paragraph. Your longer chapters are very hard to read, because of the paragraph abuse... I'll put off approving the most recent chapter until i see some improvement in the second and third chapters.

Bleh. I hate being like that, but if i get a headache from trying to read your fic, i don't want to unleash it on other people. My job is to make this place the best it can be for our users, and so I'm going to have to ask you to do a bit more work on your middle chapters. If you want I'll edit the last chapter and approve it, so you can get an idea of what i'm looking for.

Kavi_Darkwolf says:

Soooo SORRY!! *cry* I thought that was how we were supposed to do it on this site. I don't know where I heard that though. again, sorry. *cry*

Niko the ninja says:

Hey, Kavi. You sound like someone I know.

Kavi_Darkwolf says:

Really! Good for me! Tell me what you think of my story.

WindWakerJabun says:

decent needs better punctuation and word choice but good

star_breaker says:

This is mega cool. Iove it!!!!! (And unlike you with my story, Kavi, I can stomach yours!) happy.gif lol

Legends_awaiting says:

new.gif Nice Job !